I used to think there was no such thing as too much of a good thing.
If good is good, then more of it must be better, right?
Wrong. So wrong. Because THIS is the new situation.
FasTaco happened. A lot of it. It’s delicious.
There is too much of me and hubby thinks there is too much of him so we have decided to do something about it.
I honestly plan to clone him in triplicate the minute I get the technology down, but whatever…..
If I could only order more of him like that.
Basically, it is time for us to get serious again about our health.
I have hired both a nutritionist and a personal trainer for the Garcia household since apparently, we knew how to take care of 20- and 30-year-old bodies but NOT 40- and 50-year-old ones
Please wish us luck. And that we don’t kill each other or anyone else while getting through it.
I am literally paid to help others devise strategies that work best for them to get their desired results, and then to apply practical, real-life experience and expertise to help implement and execute those strategies.
That sounded fancy.
I also have a pretty successful track record.
At least for those who listen.
Even when it’s like THIS
You know what, though? It doesn’t feel fancy when your input is ignored and problems continue, or when you have to find a way to tactfully tell the one paying you that they are, in fact, the one causing said problems.
Cue repeat.
It actually feels more like THIS:
Because NEWS FLASH: Not everyone takes that information well.
Yeah, I know. Shocking, huh?
THEN let’s add in the fun of watching these same humans go through mentor after coach after consultant after expert…..who all provide nearly identical input, but with no positive changes, because you know, THAT person has to be wrong. And that one, too.And that one…..
I love what I do. All of it. And I have worked hard to learn and become what some consider to be an Expert (blush!) in my chosen fields.
I also truly love my clients and want to help them get what they need as quickly and as efficiently as possible.
And I know I am not the only one who usually feels fulfilled by the job(s) and satisfied with the results but occasionally feels frustrated and undervalued since it is all part of understanding human nature.
We do work with humans, after all. So I feel stabby some days, too.
It would be so nice if said humans knew exactly what they needed and how to specifically ask for it so that reality can match expectations and avoid unnecessary frustration a lot sooner, wouldn’t it?
Why, YES! Yes, it would.
If you kept asking for spinach so I kept handing you spinach although you REALLY meant to say bacon…who is really to blame here if you didn’t get the bacon you REALLY wanted and ended up with a pile of spinach?You are.
Yes, YOU.
How about if you ordered bacon but were only willing to pay for spinach?
Yep, still you.
AND you still end up with no bacon!
*I should probably also add that anyone who does not already know the difference between spinach and bacon is probably a dangerous psychopath who is way beyond my ability to help anyway.
SO…..
Here are some advicerecommendationsreminderstruths basics that will help you stop getting kale when you want bacon:
DON’T be surprised when the old “you get what you pay for” fundamental turns out to be true as we have literally been taught this for most of our adult lives
DON’T expect the knowledge, expertise, and results of a senior-level Accountant or Advisor if only willing to pay for an entry-level Bookkeeper (as one example), or expect a General Practitioner holding a scalpel to perform brain surgery as well as a board-certified Neurosurgeon would (as another)
DON’T think you have to know everything ~ but DO know enough to know what you don’t know
DO learn to be specific about what the need is and how to get it, as well as who should help
DO what you are really good at and enjoy doing, and leave the rest alone
DO take in the advice of a proven expert, especially when it has already been paid for
DO continue being the badass you were truly meant to be!
Ok, rant officially over. Back to the fancy stuff.
*If I have not completely scared you off yet, and you/your business have needs I can assist with or help you get more specific about, feel free to schedule a consult HERE: https://calendly.com/qbpaige
If you are interested in any more explanation on why I started this than the image + caption below, you can catch up on my first post on it (that includes some good links on stuff to watch) HERE:My WHY (A Blog About The Blog)
Because I have NEVER liked being told what to do
(or think, or say, or pretty much anything else)
and never will.
Spoiler Alert: I still don’t.
THIS blog site opened in 2019.
While many people are using countless platforms to communicate and a good old-fashioned blog can seem like something ‘old people’ do, I’ll tell you my main reason for choosing it (aside from the fact that I AM old in a lot of ways!), which is this:
Everything here belongs to me and I own it forever and it’s ALL MINE.
And we should definitely listen to him because he clearly knows things.
Sammy has been having a good time.
Let’s be more like Sammy 😆
As a matter of fact, let’s listen to him right now. Then come back to me.
You’re welcome.
Ahhhh…wasn’t that fun?
I was talking to a young-ish (early 30s) adult the other day and he came up. Can you believe she didn’t know who that was? She clearly wasn’t raised right, poor thing.That’s what made me think of this now. Welcome to my brain.
Back to the point.
I have social media. I understand the purpose and agree that it can be useful. I mean, I CAN be found HERE:
What I don’t agree with is how we are spied on. It’s getting even creepier, too.
If you really want to get in the know, or at least more informed, watch “The Creepy Line” or “The Great Hack” (both documentaries, both on Netflix), or “Shadow Government” on Prime (this one was released in 2008, so you can only imagine the advances since then but it was infuriating enough).
I also don’t agree with the control the platforms have over what we see and how and when we see it, and the constant algorithm changes. Since most are “free” (although there is no such thing), we have to agree that they can do whatever they choose however they choose to do it with our information.
I don’t know about you, but I prefer to make my own choices for myself, thankyouverymuch.
And now there is SnapChat and TikTok and specific sites just for rants, just for pics, just for promoting your business. They’ll keep changing and I’m exhausted.
Remember Classmates and MyLife and MySpace? Neither do most other people. Those are where social media started, and NO ONE uses them now.
So a blog could be my main hub from here on out. Things can always be shared from it to other sites, but what is mine stays MINE. I paid for it and it is all copyrighted and there is no worry about algorithms and changing platforms and readers can see whatever they want, whenever they want.
I know some of y’all have kind of weird interests, too (I am looking at YOU, Dr. P!mp|eP0pper-watchers!), so I thought you might find this interesting.
You know you want to see it.
It IS pretty gross, though, so if you are not one of those weirdos like us, you should go away now.
You will get plenty of text as scrolling ‘ground cover’ to give yourself a chance to run away before then, but if you decide to continue…..consider yourself as having been officially warned.
So I was in the hospital last week (and ICYMI or you got here from somewhere else, you can catch up on itHERE).
I had so much abdominal pain that I couldn’t sleep one night, and by morning, I had had enough already.
Now, I’m a pretty tough cookie about most things, most of the time, but I knew this was not normal and was not going to fix itself.
I also have no patience for wasting time, so I raced off on the journey of discovery to find out wtf was the problem.
The entire day was somewhat of a debacle (and believe me, I will have plenty to say about thatsome other time), but fast forward to where I get to tell you I was admitted to a surgical center and scheduled for an appendectomy first thing the next morning.
Thankfully, my surgeon was not only amazing but also a weirdo like us, and seemed to know somehow that I would enjoy seeing full-color photos of my insides.
So she took some.
And I did!
And so will you, if you’re still here.
So THIS one is just for the weirdos who want to see it.
Are you ready for this?
This is what an appendix looks like, with some necrosis.
Blech.
So, who wants chicken for dinner? NOT ME. Maybe never ever again, now.
Time lapse of being diagnosed, admitted, operated on, released, and discharged from the hospital to home to recover = 30 hours.
The speed was probably a direct result of my being such a godawful patient but I’m #notevensorry about it, just wait until I tell y’all about it.I’m pretty sure you’ll be on my side.
I am still pretty sore and swollen from the surgery, but to those of you who called, texted, prayed, sent well wishes – thank you! I got them all and felt the love.
Back at you! From me AND the smiling swollen belly scar.
Excuse the nails, no polish allowed during surgery
I swear, I USED to have abs. Maybe they took those instead of my appendix?
Have you ever had your appendix taken out? If so, how long were you in the hospital and how long did it take you to fully recover?
So my last post talked about how “that’s quite enough, thanks” (and in case you got here from somewhere else, you can catch up on it HERE), right?
Well, that’s what I get for thinking…..
Literally within the next 72 hours of publishing it, I was:
Presented with a new business opportunity
Admitted to the hospital for a (surprise!) appendectomy
Involved in some very loud, tense arguments with several members of the hospital staff that spanned hours, by the end of which I was threatening to burn it all down (and meant every.effing.word.)
Through surgery, released (still on time to make my mani-pedi) and almost fully recovered
Working my way through $10k+ worth of projects that amassed while I wasn’t looking
But I’m fine. Really.
The scary thing is…..I look like this right about now, too.
Usually, this is where I want to know how you’re doing, and get your input – but I’m afraid the universe is listening and will take it as an invitation to show me more crazy, so maybe later…..
And we thought 2020 was the only year that needed therapy and chocolate and fuzzy blankets.
Spoiler alert: this is not a real post with anything particularly useful, but if you have it in you to hang through it, it might help to at least explain SOME of what all is going on around here.
I’ve been too busy everywhere but HERE for a while.
But I didn’t desert you.
I had my moments of temptation, though.
BUT if I ran away, I know that there would just be fires there for me to put out too, so no point in leaving all of my favorite stuff.
I have watched some $hitshows.
I get close enough to see, but not get splattered on
My own life became more chaotic than usual, and there were days that even ‘The Machine’ shut down because there was just not enough caffeine on the entire planetto handle so much crazy.
I guess its not ALL bad, though.
Here’s the recap:
I opened another business as Owner and it took off (much faster than I expected it to)
I fired and hired assistants (and the learning curves really need to lay off the nachos)
A frivolous claim was filed against me (that I disputed and won, but it was a pain to deal with)
Our local decision makers sometimes act worse than anyone else we know, and it is hard to stay optimistic about our future or passionate about opportunities with all of the drama going on, much less get actively involved or keep trying to make a difference
I am potentially losing my star player to bigger and better things (because I have worked myself out of a job again)
Three of the companies I work for are actively going through some big transitions (and I am responsible for much of the choices that affect the outcomes, so the pressure is real)
We lost my sweet Pop, with no warning at all (I am not only a Daddy’s Girl, but also the Executor of his estate, so there is a lot to do while grieving pretty hard, and no time to do it in)
Our newest Grand was born a month early, without warning, in the same week my Dad died and also on what would have been our son’s 30th birthday (so the emotions around all of that are pretty interesting)
We have two, count them, TWO new Grandgirls coming in November!
We took a long-overdue vacation and are still unpacking with another trip already booked
Our favorite niece is getting married and moving out next month and I am not ready for it
We’ll get to mark another concert off of our bucket list (Eric Clapton will be here soon and guess who has tickets?!?)
Captain Helpful reminds me that work-wise, I am getting everything I have worked so hard for, and I know he’s right, but still…..
20/20 vision is a term used to express perfect clarity and sharpness of vision. Too bad no one wanted to see ANY of THIS
Please forgive the language (theirs, not mine).
Remember those New Year’s Resolutions or affirmations or whatever the h-e-double-l we were making when we were younger, and had more hope? We werejustprecious.
Should have taken my eyes out with a dull butter knife
I have purposely not complained or really even mentioned the pandemic or the presidential election in any public spaces. I have also respectfully declined most opportunities to discuss them when someone is attempting to provoke me. Why, you ask? For one, there are already WAY too many opinions being yelled at each other out there to add MY one more. For two, it’s all just too…..what’s the word…..depressing? Stressful? Anxiety-inducing?
Found it.
I still don’t have anything necessary or thought-provoking or profound to add, so I’ll just leave us with a few more images that seem to sum it all up:
2020 is a southern male, and there WERE injuries
At first, introverts rejoiced – we like to “Stay the F*ck at Home”
Have you ever been surprised by things you have been told about yourself?
Many of us feel we are a wide-open book. We have the same families and most of the same friends for most of our lives and just add new ones to the pack as we go. I have also been with the same small, independently-owned company in daily interaction with the same core team for almost 15 years. Social media has us connected to each other (and some of us waaayyy oversharing) just as often as we care to be.
After ALL of that, we think we know each other pretty well, right?
Well, I am still surprised to find out that this is not always the case!
For someone who has been accused of being too honest, too blunt, too direct more times than I can count (now those are no big surprise), it DOES surprise me when someone has a brand new observation or perception of me that I just never saw coming.
Here are the most surprising (to me, anyway!) things I have been told about myself, all within the past year:
You are hard to get to know (said to me by new people)
It is hard to be your friend sometimes, you don’t seem to need anybody (said to me by a good friend)
You can be very intimidating (said to me by morepeople than I would have thought)
You always have a wall up (said to me by my best friend of 30+ years)
I was shocked, I tell you…..SHOCKED
I thought I was pretty open and have a lot of people in my life to be hard to know or hard to be friends with – but that last one shocked me right out of my socks. This is a person who has seen me through complete, full-blown meltdowns, who knows everything about me (or so I thought). How does she think I have a wall up with HER?Is it my RBF (resting b!tch face)? Hey, that one is NOT my fault.
And I thought I knew myself pretty well already. I have completed every personality and character identifier known to exist. I know my IQ, MBTI type, DISC profile, Kolbe index, Enneagram number, astrological sign, and what factors birth order play in things. Let me just tell you, EVERY SINGLE ONE of those reports some pretty strong warning labels traits. I suppose it is natural for some feathers to get ruffled along the way!
Random feathers have never concerned me very much, but the ones in my own pack DO. So I am doing some self-reflecting…..
While I am still figuring out how to be better at this whole “human interaction” thing, I have THIS:
Most accurate quote to describe me I have ever seen
Guess what? This means ALL of Y’ALL! HA!
NOW I want to hear more about YOU!
What have you heard about yourself that you thought was completely untrue?
Auto-correct keeps flagging this one, and I don’t know why! It may not be a recognized word in our dictionary, but it absolutely should be!
I am not a rescuer. I am not a fixer. I am not even a very good commiserator. My truest nature is that of an empowerer.
I discuss this in another post, you can catch up on that HERE.
I have also been called a bad influence, but that can’t be right.
Expecting myself AND others to bring their best game on and really show up is what makes that happen. EVERY SINGLE TIME. I know there are times when this seems difficult. I also know that one of the greatest gifts we can give is to help create those “lightbulb moments” for others, so that is what I do whenever I can.
Then I stay around long enough to help devise the ‘how to’ strategies, help develop the methods to accomplish them, and encourage the entire time.
Usually. this also means that I am worked out of a job.
We raised an independent kid who didn’t NEED anybody (including us!). My mom-heart hurt sometimes over that, because there were moments I REALLY missed the little boy who would launch himself at me for a big squeeze. It was worth it though, as raising a kid who will always NEED you (just to satisfy your own co-dependent baggage) WILL hurt the kid eventually. So I did the right thing by him and raised the kind of man he wanted to be. The one the world needed…..not the one I needed for my own selfishness.
“Ewww…..Mom! Not in public!”
But he WOULD kiss himself in public. Go figure!
I also teach clients, knowing this may lead to them doing my job themselves and not needing to pay me to do it anymore. That is okay. There is plenty of work to do and not enough qualified people to do it as it is, which is why I am also happy training other professionals (and learning from them!).
The nonprofit organization I founded, The FLIP Group, Inc. exists solely to support-equip-empower young adults – but I am currently spending most of my time and energy on a specific few that work for/with me. Knowing that I am empowering them to be their best selves and teaching them everything I can, mentoring them instead of “bossing” them, means that I WILL lose them. They WILL leave me for other opportunities. I WILL be okay about that too, when that time comes, because sometimes working yourself out of a job means you did your job.
Please don’t be afraid to do your job when you have to, even when that job is hard.
QUESTION(s): How can I empower YOU or YOUR BUSINESS right now?
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