Tag: support-equip-empower

Posted in BadAssery, Random Bumble, Show Up or Shut Up, The REAL

Worked Out Of A Job

Posted on by Pageflipme

Empowerer. Empower-er. EMPOWERER.

Auto-correct keeps flagging this one, and I don’t know why! It may not be a recognized word in our dictionary, but it absolutely should be!

I am not a rescuer. I am not a fixer. I am not even a very good commiserator. My truest nature is that of an empowerer.

I discuss this in another post, you can catch up on that HERE.

I have also been called a bad influence, but that can’t be right.

Expecting myself AND others to bring their best game on and really show up is what makes that happen. EVERY SINGLE TIME. I know there are times when this seems difficult. I also know that one of the greatest gifts we can give is to help create those “lightbulb moments” for others, so that is what I do whenever I can.

Then I stay around long enough to help devise the ‘how to’ strategies, help develop the methods to accomplish them, and encourage the entire time.

Usually. this also means that I am worked out of a job.

We raised an independent kid who didn’t NEED anybody (including us!). My mom-heart hurt sometimes over that, because there were moments I REALLY missed the little boy who would launch himself at me for a big squeeze. It was worth it though, as raising a kid who will always NEED you (just to satisfy your own co-dependent baggage) WILL hurt the kid eventually. So I did the right thing by him and raised the kind of man he wanted to be. The one the world needed…..not the one I needed for my own selfishness.

  • “Ewww…..Mom! Not in public!”
  • But he WOULD kiss himself in public. Go figure!

I also teach clients, knowing this may lead to them doing my job themselves and not needing to pay me to do it anymore. That is okay. There is plenty of work to do and not enough qualified people to do it as it is, which is why I am also happy training other professionals (and learning from them!).

The nonprofit organization I founded, The FLIP Group, Inc. exists solely to support-equip-empower young adults – but I am currently spending most of my time and energy on a specific few that work for/with me. Knowing that I am empowering them to be their best selves and teaching them everything I can, mentoring them instead of “bossing” them, means that I WILL lose them. They WILL leave me for other opportunities. I WILL be okay about that too, when that time comes, because sometimes working yourself out of a job means you did your job.

Please don’t be afraid to do your job when you have to, even when that job is hard.

QUESTION(s): How can I empower YOU or YOUR BUSINESS right now?

Posted in Random Bumble, The REAL

Disguised As ___, Part 1

Posted on by Pageflipme

First, Love

Before you get mad, please trust that I didn’t trick you with a click-bait title, and hang in there with me even if it takes me a few extra words. Hey, I already warned you I was wordy. There IS a point, I promise.

Have I ever lied to you before? Of course not.

Talking about romantic love is too icky for me and I am definitely not going there.

Y’all should have known better than that already, anyway.

If it helps, use another word or phrase you are more comfortable with – care, help, serve, minister, pay forward, show up…..

However, (and I’m sorry to break this to you, I hated breaking it to ME), all of those are ways we love others.

There is a best-selling book by author Gary Chapman called The 5 Love Languages® that talks about different ways people show up with love.  That title and way of describing them are cringe-y to me, but the information is solid, I promise.  I am going to mention a few of them for context – and if I get in trouble, just remember that I do it all for you…..

For years, my sweet husband has been sending a devotional or at least inspirational text every morning to a circle of people (that is still growing), and this looks like ‘Words of Affirmation’.

We recently found out that this is really a very necessary public service…..

He’s a big tough guy, too. That throat punch would probably kill somebody.

He also makes enough for an army when asked to cook or bake for events and gives it all away so that could look like ‘Receiving Gifts’.

  • Can’t we just eat the dough?
  • Of course we can.
    (He showed up with this as I was writing.)

He’s actually showing up with these AND his true love language, which is by performing ‘Acts of Service’. He’s extra too, doing two at once.

So, that went somewhere else…aaaannnnddd now I’m distracted…..ok, bringing it back now…….

My truest nature is that of an empowerer, and that is how I love others, but that can seem disguised as other things, too.  I have been told I was too direct, too demanding, too REAL, for expecting myself AND others to bring their best game to the table and show up for themselves and you know what?  Most of the time, we do!  That can happen during ‘Quality Time’ or ‘Words’ or ‘Acts’ but however they happen – aren’t those one of the greatest gifts, helping to create those “lightbulb moments”? I think so too, so that is what I do whenever I can.

We need to remember to look up once in a while. Just knowing that someone showed up for us is more important than how they do it, because sometimes it comes in disguise.

We also need to remember that no matter how smart we are or how much we think we know, we still get it wrong sometimes. The picture you see featured for this is really people showing up for each other after surviving a terrible ordeal, disguised as friends having a beer. All my love to y’all.

QUESTION(s): How do you love others? What is the most unexpected way someone showed up for you?